To Up Sales, Up Words!

I first taught this technique in 1998. While there have been tons of improvements since then, today I still see copy on so many websites, sales letters or emails using a language that only the person who wrote them understands.

People still seem to ignore their readers.

Abraham Maslow once commented, “If all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail.” Abraham Maslow may have been a psychologist, but he probably knew more about copywriting and particularly selling than what most people cared to admit.

Even now, most of the copy I critique disobey this important rule the most. Their sales message doesn’t communicate with their readers, particularly at THEIR level. Now, I’m not talking about a socioeconomic or educational level. I’m talking about the level at which they understand and, above all, make buying decisions.

They fail to use what I call “upwords.”

It’s an acronym that means…

“Universal Picture Words Or Relatable, Descriptive Sentences.”

Upwords are words that paint vivid pictures in the mind, or expressions that describe an idea to which the mind of your reader (or prospect) can relate to.

I once took a communications course in which I discovered an interesting example of the way the mind works. As part of a given lesson, a videotape was shown of a televised newscast during which a journalist was about to give a live report on a fire that was devastating a large forest.

The news anchor in the television newsroom said: “We now take you to Sally Smith, who’s in the station’s helicopter flying above the scene of the fire.” He then turned around to face the background screen, which showed a live bird’s-eye view of the raging fire.

He asked: “Tell us, Sally, how big is the fire?”

In a voice partially drowned by the whizzing sound of helicopter blades, Sally reports: “John, it’s so big, it’s covering well over 140 acres of land — now that’s about 200 football fields back-to-back for you and me.”

As you can see, people think in pictures, not in words and certainly not in numbers (unless it is told to do exactly that). The mind hates confusion. It will naturally translate words or phrases into a visual equivalent.

For instance, if I told you to think of a garbage can, you’re not going to think of the letters “G,” “A,” “R,” “B,” etc. Your mind will automatically visualize some sort of garbage can.

Microsoft and MacIntosh dominate the marketplace in operating systems because, rather than typing some elaborate command for your computer to execute, you can simply use your mouse, point to an icon that represents the command (or program) and click.

Icons represent commands, which are translated into programs (i.e., codes or languages) that the computer understands. In the same way, the mind works very much like a computer does.

People who know little about computers will likely have a difficult time understanding the various written commands, scripts and codes that the computer needs to process. But on the other hand, most of us can easily identify the icons that symbolize them.

Similarly, the brain instantly translates the information it receives into something it can easily understand and execute — something it already knows and can easily refer to. Albeit a quick one, there is always a translation process going on.

And we must be aware of that.

The challenge facing most marketers is to ensure that their copy communicates effectively to its audience, especially when communicating the benefits of an offer is at the heart of making profitable sales. The big test for marketers, therefore, is to put ourselves in our reader’s shoes.

It is important to communicate using a language that the vast majority of people in your target market can easily understand and appreciate. It is Mark Twain who once said, “Numbers don’t stick in the mind; pictures do.”

So, the more you use upwords in your copy, the more your reader will not only visualize and grasp the message you’re trying to convey, but also appreciate that message at a deeper, more intimate, and more visceral level.

And THAT is the level I was referring to, earlier.

Upwords are words and phrases that help messages to be easily read, understood and interpreted by the majority of the people to whom the message is targeted, like with the use of mental imagery, examples, analogies, metaphors, picture words, etc.

For example, in my early career I specialized in copy for cosmetic surgeons. And a challenge among doctors is the fact that people will call for a quote over the phone when a surgeon needs to see the patient beforehand to make an assessment.

But obviously, cosmetic surgery is an uncommon process. People don’t understand why doctors can’t simply give out quotes over the phone.

So I tell doctors to use a more common approach, such as cosmetic dentistry for example, as an analogy. Why? It’s because, unlike cosmetic surgery, most people have had their teeth done at some point. That way, their brains have something it can remember, picture, and of course, relate to.

So when asked for a quote over the phone, doctors will say: “Just like a dentist, I can’t give an estimate over the phone without any X-rays of your teeth” or “without the knowledge of how many cavities you really have.”

Marketers are certainly in a similar position.

Many tend to communicate in a language that only a few understand. If you’re a programmer selling your services to business owners, and your copy is laced with technical jargon that only geeks will understand, you will obviously do very poorly.

You must therefore mold your message in a way that it can be easily understood by your target market. So speak their language!

If your market consists of artists, use art examples. If it’s comprised of managers, use business analogies. If it’s made up of fishing aficionados, use fishing metaphors.

For example, you sell customer service consulting to florists. You can say: “Clients are like fresh-cut roses; they need to be handled efficiently. But if handled improperly, they can prick your business or simply wilt away.”

Here’s a recent example.

One website I recently critiqued sold “microdermabrasion” skincare lotion. It’s a facial scrub that smoothes away wrinkles. But the problem is the fact that she only used the term “microdermabrasion.” However, nobody understood that. The only benefit mentioned was “skin regeneration.”

So I realized that her lotion offers three main benefits.

• It reduces the appearance of wrinkles,
• It comes in a easy-to-use homecare kit,
• And it’s gentle on skin, or “pH balanced.”

But these are not benefits let alone ideas her target market can easily appreciate. Granted, they may understand what these are, and they likely understand what “microdermabrasion” is. But they don’t understand what those benefits are at an intimate level. So, I told her to change it to:

“Reverse the aging process and give your skin a youthful radiance with our non-acidic, non-greasy facelift in a jar! Imagine, no inconvenient clinics. No risks associated with harsh chemicals peels or injections. No costly doctors or surgeries. Get beautiful skin in hours in the comfort of your own home! It’s like the power of a sandblaster applied with the gentleness of velvet glove!”

There are many more ways of applying upwords to your sales copy. Here are some brief examples of how to mold your message in order to communicate more effectively…

1) Repetitious Words

As the adage goes, “Repetition is the parent of learning.” Repetition aids comprehension and increases retention, especially of complex or critical ideas. But the objective is not to repeat the same words over and over. It’s to use different examples to illustrate your point and drive the idea home.

To that end, substitute certain words with synonyms and add new pieces of information each time the idea is repeated. Here’s an example to show you. In order to drive the idea that privacy policies on a website help to increase sales, it can be repeated with:

• “Privacy policies promote purchases,”
• “Privacy statements increase sales,”
• “Confidentiality is a key to online success,”
• “Posting a privacy policy is profitable,” etc.

2) Emotional Words

Again, words are not messages in themselves. They are symbols. Different words mean different things to different people. As such, they can be interpreted differently. While several words can be used to communicate a single message, your choice of words is the most important decision you will ever make. Words can actually alter the impact of your message. For example:

• Instead of “cost,” say “investment,”
• Instead of beautiful “teeth,” say beautiful “smiles,”
• Instead of “skinny,” say “slim” or “slender,”
• Instead of “products” or “services,” say “solutions,”
• Instead of “cost-effective,” say “return on investment,”
• And instead of “house,” say “home.”

3) Positive Words

As my friend and copywriter, Rachel McAlpine, often says, “Avoid using negative words — say what it is, not what it isn’t.” I agree. Rachel is absolutely right on the money.

Maxwell Maltz, who wrote the bestseller “Psycho-Cybernetics,” states that the brain is a goal-seeking organ. It needs a goal in order to function. For example, if I told you to NOT think of a white carnation, you will have hard time since your brain needs a goal. It will naturally picture what it is supposed to avoid. The mind needs a reference point. A visual equivalent.

On the other hand, if I asked you to think of a pink carnation instead of a white one, you will think of a pink carnation. (And you won’t think of a white one!) I gave your mind a goal rather than taking one away from it.

By stating what something isn’t can be counterproductive since it is still directing the mind, albeit in the opposite way. If I told you that dental work is painless for example, you’ll still focus on the word “pain” in “painless.”

Here are some examples of using positive words:

• Instead of saying “inexpensive,” say “economical,”
• Instead of saying “this procedure is painless,” say “there’s little discomfort” or “it’s relatively comfortable,”
• And instead of saying “this software is error-free” or “foolproof,” say “this software is consistent” or “stable.”

One of the most negative words we use is the word “but.” “Buts” can turn any message, which in essence may be positive, into a negative. Plus, a statement followed by the word “but” subtly communicates to others that what was said up to that point was a lie and what follows is the truth.

Remember when a former girlfriend or boyfriend dumped you? They probably said: “You’re really nice and I like going out with you, but…” (I’m sure you know the rest.) Consequently, leave the “but” out. Rather, use “and” and then focus on the positive.

For example, you’re a website designer. Instead of saying to your client, “It’s a great website but expensive,” say “it’s a great website AND worth every cent.” Instead of, “it’s a great website but it’s going to take at least a month to create it,” say “it’s a great website AND it will only take thirty days to get it up and running.”

Can you see the difference?

We all come from different backgrounds. Each individual has a unique education, experience and environment. They all condition our thinking. So use analogies, metaphors and imagery in your copy that will make your message easier to grasp by that person’s set of circumstances.

As Jack Trout once said…

“A word is worth a thousand pictures.”

Last 5 Posts by Michel Fortin

• Social Media Isn’t Dead, But It Can Be Deadly
• How to Extract Doubt From Your Sales Copy
• It’s Not About Facebook, It’s About Integrity
• Did Larry Winget Go Overboard?
• The Oft-Confused Features And Benefits

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