“Try not to become a man of success, but to become a man of value.”
– Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

“When your values are clear to you, making decisions becomes easier.”
– Roy Disney

People say “change your attitudes” or “have a positive attitude,” but I don’t agree since attitudes can not be changed. They are results and not causes. They are byproducts of your innermost convictions. They are reflections of your deepest values. You can’t just change them on a whim because your outside is but a mirror reflection of your inside.

If you’re going to change your outside, you must stick to your values. If you remain consistent with them, you remain true to yourself and will become genuinely motivated. You will naturally have a positive attitude because you are connected with your higher self.

Like I said earlier, many people achieve their goals only to ask themselves in the end, “Is this it?” “Is this what I really wanted?” “I worked hard for this?” “Why am I not happy?” or, “Where do I go from here?” Obviously, goals alone can create a great deal of frustration even after they have been reached.

If you plan activities that revolve inexorably around your core priorities, your sense of purpose will therefore guide you in creating better goals and activities with which you will be much more productive in executing. How do you do that? First, you set your values and prioritize them — these are your priorities. Then and only then, you set your goals and align them with your priorities.

So, before you climb the ladder of success, you must ensure that it is leaning against the right wall by aligning your goals with your true priorities. Ultimately, goals and values should become one and the same. We, as individuals, are different not only by our core values but by the hierarchy of those values.

Let me give you an example. Hyrum Smith, author of The 10 Natural Laws of Successful Time and Life Management, uses an imaginary “I-beam” exercise in his seminars. An I-beam is a steel beam used in the construction of building frames.

While they can be as long as several hundred feet or even more, they’re only about a foot and a half wide. In fact, they are called “I-beams” because a cross section of the steel beam would look like the letter “I.” (If you put the beam on its side, it would look like an “H.”)

Mr. Smith tells his audiences, “Let’s say we have an imaginary I-beam stretching across the conference room floor. You’re at one end of the beam and I’m at the other.” Mr. Smith then asks, “Can you walk across the beam without falling off?” “Sure,” the audience replies.

Mr. Smith then changes the scenario. He says, “What would make a difference in your thinking is if I took the beam and hung it between the two World Trade Center towers in New York city, dangling several thousands of feet above the ground and braced at both ends.” At this point, he asks, “Would you cross the beam now?” The audience shouts, “Of course not!”

“Would you do it for a hundred dollars?” adds Mr. Smith. “Would you do it for a thousand or even a million dollars?” Now, the last figure does cause some people in the audience to hesitate a little bit. But even then, most people refuse the offer. They value their own life far more than they do the money. “They would far rather be alive than be rich,” as Hyrum would say.

Nevertheless, what Mr. Smith tried to do in this particular situation is to have people reveal their true priorities, especially to themselves. In an instant, money, which was long thought to be a priority, became secondary when their own lives are placed in the scenario.

However, it didn’t end there.

Some people value other things even greater than their own lives. For instance, after asking the parent of young child to participate, he conducted his exercise and then said, “What would you say if I kidnapped your child, held a gun to your child’s head, and asked you to cross the beam or else the child suffers the consequences? Would you cross it then?” Many parents would cross the beam, obviously with a great deal of fear and trepidation, but without question. They value their children’s lives before their own.

Mr. Smith, who had been doing this exercise flawlessly many times in the past, encountered a snag one day. He did his I-beam test with a mother of a two year old and asked her to cross the beam. To the amazement of both Mr. Smith and the audience, she refused to cross. When asked why, the mother answered, “If I die, I have nobody to take care of my seven other children.”

As you might imagine, there was a tremendous sigh of relief that could be felt across the entire room. Nevertheless, the point is that every single person has not only a different set of values but also a different prioritization of those values. In this case, the mother didn’t want to deprive her seven children of a mother.

While each person’s set of values may resemble one another, the order of importance in which they are placed is clearly an individual process based on many different factors. One’s experiences, education, philosophies, upbringing, culture, sex, race, religion, and of course, conditioning play very dynamic roles.

This is why there is a third element to this disparity between us humans.

In addition to personal values and their prioritization, a person’s uniqueness is also defined by the manner in which he is aligned with his distinct hierarchy of values. This is the reason why some people are genuinely motivated and love what they do, while others need constant reinforcement or a “carrot-and-stick” support system. It’s also why some people can deal with their challenges very easily while others quit or cut corners when they feel challenged or overwhelmed.

About the Author

Michel Fortin is a direct response copywriter, author, speaker, consultant, and CEO of The Success Doctor, Inc. Visit his blog and signup free to get tested conversion strategies and response-boosting tips by email, along with blog updates, news, and more! Go now to http://www.michelfortin.com.

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